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Self-Pity by D H Lawrence – Famous poems, famous poets. – All Poetry

Self-Pity

I never saw a wild thing
sorry for itself.
A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough
without ever having felt sorry for itself.
— Read on allpoetry.com/Self-Pity

This may be what Lawrence (or we) would prefer to believe about wild things, but consider those dolphins who refuse to eat after the death of a mate. Consider those geese who search for the lost mate until they themselves become disoriented and die. In fact the grieving have ur-sent reasons, even an urgent need, to feel sorry for them-selves. Husbands walk out, wives walk out, divorces happen, but these husbands and wives leave behind them webs of intact associations, however acrimonious.

Only the survivors of a death are truly left alone.

Joan Didion, the year of magical, thinking, 2005, Vintage Books, New York, NY, page 193. 

“I see them in trees, or on ledges of buildings, as cheerful as saints, or thieves of the small job who have been, one more night, successful—and like all successes, it turns my thoughts to myself. Should I have led a more simply life?”

Crows

By Mary Oliver

September 17, 2000

Should I have led a more simple life?
Have my ambitions been worthy?
Has the wind, for years, been talking to me as well?
Somewhere, among all my thoughts, there is a narrow path.

It’s attractive, but who could follow it?
Slowly the full morning

“Crows,” by Mary Oliver | The New Yorker

In Japan, in Seattle, In Indonesia—there they were—
each one loud and hungry,
crossing a field, or sitting
above the traffic, or dropping
to the lawn of some temple to sun itself
or walk about on strong legs,
like a landlord. I think
they don’t envy anyone or anything—
not the tiger, not the emperor,
not even the philosopher.
Why should they?
The wind is their friend, the least tree is home.
Nor is melody, they have discovered, necessary.
Nor have they delicate palates;
without hesitation they will eat
anything you can think of—
corn, mice, old hamburgers—
swallowing with such hollering and gusto
no one can tell whether it’s a brag
or a prayer of deepest thanks. At sunrise, when I walk out,
I see them in trees, or on ledges of buildings,
as cheerful as saints, or thieves of the small job
who have been, one more night, successful—
and like all successes, it turns my thoughts to myself.
Should I have led a more simple life?
Have my ambitions been worthy?
Has the wind, for years, been talking to me as well?
Somewhere, among all my thoughts, there is a narrow path.
It’s attractive, but who could follow it?
Slowly the full morning
draws over us its mysterious and lovely equation.
Then, in the branches poling from their dark center,
ever more flexible and bright,
sparks from the sun are bursting and melting on the birds’ wings,
as, indifferent and comfortable,
they lounge, they squabble in the vast, rose-colored light.

Published in the print edition of the September 25, 2000, issue of the New Yorker.

Mary Oliver won a Pulitzer Prize and a National Book Award for her poetry. A volume of selected poems, “Devotions,” was published in 2017. She died in 2019.