Disappearing Pain

All Things Are Lessons God Would Have Me Learn.

Lesson 193 in A Course in Miracles says that all pain is caused by lack of forgiveness. If we believe the pain is real, “death becomes our choice instead of life.” I can tell when my perception is failing me and I am failing to learn the lesson. I can tell because I perceive pain as real. Then I know to look for a hidden “unforgiveness.” There are a few simple words which return me to a position of power in my life instead of powerlessness: I will forgive, and this will disappear.

To put this in the language of Landmark, today I take on full responsibility for being cause in the matter of my life. I will practice forgiveness, even when I perceive that my distress, anger, pain, hurt does not appear to be unforgiveness. In fact, especially then. I will wear this ACIM wisdom today – “No one can hide forever from a truth so very obvious that it appears in countless forms, and is recognized as easily in all of them, if one wants to see the simple lesson there.” I want to see the lesson. Forgive, and I will see this differently.

I forgive myself for being afraid and pretending that I wasn’t, for rushing in, for not risking more rigorous honesty, for lashing out in anger to defend myself from perceived threats, for playing small, for not being fully self-expressed. I forgive him for being afraid, for his lack of trust, for pretending he was available, for his angry outbursts to defend himself from perceived threats. I honor us for trying, for loving, for risking what we did, for forgiveness and the many other lessons.

Today what I am in the world for myself and my life is the possibility of unlimited joy, expansion, and responsibility for creating both.

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