Tara Beach asks us to inquire in any given moment that we notice we are beginning to shut down, “What is it you are running from?” For many of us our greatest fear is that “this is all there is.”
In discussing this very question and this particular fear yesterday, a wise friend suggested to me, “nothing is wrong,” broken, needing to be fixed or changed. He affirmed, “This is enough.” If that is true, our constant planning and organizing to defend ourselves from attacks and threats, might not be necessary. As this possibility began to penetrate my soul, I could almost hear Scooby-Doo’s confused “Hmmm?” or young Gary Coleman saying, “What you talking ’bout, Willis?”
That would be some kind of freedom. Pause a moment and imagine, who would we be if we could truly, deeply, at our cores, accept that nothing is wrong? What if we didn’t have to argue with reality about what “should be” instead of what is.
As the Universe would have it, my ACIM lesson this morning provides me this golden nugget: “A healed mind is relieved of the belief that it must plan, although it cannot know the outcome which is best, the means by which it is achieved, nor how to recognize the problem that the plan is made to solve.” (ACIM Lesson 135)
Yesterday was a beautiful day of unplanned adventure. Getting out of the way, “letting no defenses but [the] present trust direct the future” I was visited by my Mom’s loving spirit as I embarked on some serious pampering at a Nordic spa in Magog, Quebec. Hours later as I sealed in the gifts of loving kindness, eyes closed chanting by a river’s edge, I was startled by what I saw upon reopening them. The spectacular rays of sunlight brightly escaping through the trees on the far side of the river illuminated tiny white particles floating in the air, reminding me of the angels constantly surrounding me. I’m comforted by the idea I can perhaps let them protect me in the case that something might go “wrong,” at least until such time that I really learn that nothing can.
“If I defend myself I am attacked. But in defenselessness I will be strong, and I will learn what my defenses hide.”