I’m walking into a moment in my life where once again I have a great many decisions to make. Again I will be choosing where to live, what education or career to pursue, which relationships to hold close and which to allow to diminish. The last time I was at this crossroads I gave up work and moved to Bali for a year. It was a divinely inspired choice that changed my trajectory forever. Things are different today — who I am, what inspires me, what I’m willing to give up to have the life I want. I’m noticing that what is the same is a strong connection to my Higher Power and a deep love for myself. Both wavered a bit when I came back to the real world after Bali. Today I’m pleased to notice the difference as I am empowered by both once again.
Probably the most remarkable development in the past few weeks is my awareness of complete freedom. Although I did not do it entirely purposefully, it is no accident that I have designed my life such that I am completely independent, have few material attachments and no significant other. If I look to my past I can see how I got here. I have created a future, based on my first 45 years, meant to shield myself from pain. A Course in Miracles, and the helpful interpretation of it shared in Marianne Williamson’s weekly talks about it, are guiding me to a new approach. Today, now, this moment, is the only thing that actually determines my future. I get to choose differently and I get to do it daily.
I can’t summarize it better than Joe Dispenza does here:
“This is creating from beyond (or outside of) the constraints of space and time. To do this, in meditation we produce an elevated emotion and match it with a clear intention. In the process we become more energy than matter, resulting in a new potential being broadcast into the quantum field. When there’s a vibrational match between our energy and that potential in the quantum field—when we’ve locked into the frequency of that object or thing we’ve placed our energy and focus on—we collapse time. In collapsing time, space moves towards us, causing us to become the vortex that draws the new possibility towards us. In other words, we don’t have to move towards our creation, because it is moving towards us.”
My Course lesson today asks me to be quiet and listen. Before reading it I prayed, “God, please give me guidance today.” Ask and I shall receive. I’m reminded of several years ago in a 12-step meeting when I heard this play on an old adage — “Don’t just do something, sit there.” Gratefully, now I get to stop talking.